My name is Bob. Give me all your money
Lollygaggle
All that I did today was lay in bed feeling sick. Why do we do dumb things to ourselves? 24 hours I can’t get back. booooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
![lickystickypickywe:
Steve Jobs Wanted to Be Willy Wonka For a Day.
Steve,organic chocolate aficionado , wanted to be Willy Wonka. Like, become him for real, for a day. No joke.
Steve’s idea was to do a Willy Wonka with it. Just as Wonka did in the movie, Steve wanted to put a golden certificate representing the millionth iMac inside the box of one iMac, and publicize that fact. Whoever opened the lucky iMac box would be refunded the purchase price and be flown to Cupertino, where he or she (and, presumably, the accompanying family) would be taken on a tour of the Apple campus.
Steve had already instructed his internal creative group to design a prototype golden certificate, which he shared with us. But the killer was that Steve wanted to go all out on this. He wanted to meet the lucky winner in full Willy Wonka garb. Yes, complete with top hat and tails.
Apparently, there were people in the room who weren’t happy with this idea. [I don’t know who these people were, but let me tell you one thing, whoever the hell you are: you’re a bunch of asshat bozos. If The Man says he wants to be Willy Wonka for a day, you jump and order your Oompa Loompa costume on the fucking spot. Are we clear?]
At the end they couldn’t do it, Segall says, because California law doesn’t allow sweepstakes contests to require a purchase—they have to be open to everyone, which obviously defeats the whole purpose. [Well, let me tell you one thing, Californian legislators, whoever the hell you are: you’re a bunch of asshat bozos too.]](http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m33vhmdqxP1qzqvm2o1_1280.jpg)
Steve Jobs Wanted to Be Willy Wonka For a Day.
Steve,organic chocolate aficionado , wanted to be Willy Wonka. Like, become him for real, for a day. No joke.
Steve’s idea was to do a Willy Wonka with it. Just as Wonka did in the movie, Steve wanted to put a golden certificate representing the millionth iMac inside the box of one iMac, and publicize that fact. Whoever opened the lucky iMac box would be refunded the purchase price and be flown to Cupertino, where he or she (and, presumably, the accompanying family) would be taken on a tour of the Apple campus.
Steve had already instructed his internal creative group to design a prototype golden certificate, which he shared with us. But the killer was that Steve wanted to go all out on this. He wanted to meet the lucky winner in full Willy Wonka garb. Yes, complete with top hat and tails.
Apparently, there were people in the room who weren’t happy with this idea.
[I don’t know who these people were, but let me tell you one thing, whoever the hell you are: you’re a bunch of asshat bozos. If The Man says he wants to be Willy Wonka for a day, you jump and order your Oompa Loompa costume on the fucking spot. Are we clear?]At the end they couldn’t do it, Segall says, because California law doesn’t allow sweepstakes contests to require a purchase—they have to be open to everyone, which obviously defeats the whole purpose.
[Well, let me tell you one thing, Californian legislators, whoever the hell you are: you’re a bunch of asshat bozos too.]
Untitled
I live in a cottage long ago
Where Homer roamed and chocolate flowed
And when that chocolate river froze
The cottage dies and Homer’s cold.
Now in this land there are no coats,
No fireplace where chickens roasts.
The river’s stern along with boats
That will no longer sway or float
And when I thought my world had died
There’s one thing left that’s still alive
And that one thing that had survived
Was the dreadful feeling for which I cry
For days and days I attempt to hide
And when I’m found, I know I’ve tried
To fight this feeling in which I’ve strive
—- hunger tormenting me deep inside.
I am 24 years old and every other day it seems as if I’m going through a midlife crisis. I think it has something to do with life as a barely working actor. This is BULLSHIT! COMPLETE BULLSHIT! because I am still hella ass young and I refuse to have a middle point in any part of my life. I’ve been cleaning up my act this year. Feeling like a grandma most times. Doing the slow down on purpose. Sometimes I think Alzheimer and ADD are working together to end me. Everyday I am trying to see what’s the point of all this. Perhaps I am meant to be a hermit sitting under a tree in an exotic land… BUT NO, I am sitting in a well lit room typing this shit up in the middle of the night for who to read? I don’t fucking know.
Some days I don’t want to have to explain to anybody what is going on with me because that’s more talking than walking away. Man… and the stupid jobs you got to pick up to support this lifestyle. Four different jobs last year! For Really?!
I’m not really complaining. Bertha, the half-ling of bi-polaroid, just so happens to be awake. But what Bertha gots to say is…
…it’s going to be ok. Read Catch-22 as an example. It explains that in order to get out of horseshat you got to go through horseshat in order to get a good serving of horseshat. All in all, the person reading will get a good laugh.
This year my goals were to listen and to find the fun/joy in everything. April is almost over and I am still trying to begin. Maybe I got problems. Maybe I forget how lucky I am sometimes. Maybe I am ungrateful. Whatever the case, maybe is not definitive until I am proven guilty.
ORDER ORDER ORDER. HAMMER TIME!!!
